Goa (Into the Bardo)

xxxviii an ashram, i sink into, not knowingthe outcome. blackbird says, "be here now"and i listen.i don’t know what to do. so i do what i do best, i flee.  i escape into Goan waters, it goes to my mid thighs, each wave, a resurgence, a remembering.  i’m stripped down,to an olive green bikiniwith my blonde hairdripping wet with sea salt and grief.  i... Continue Reading →

Gokarna (Into the Bardo)

xlii amidst the dance, that flows around me, i feel a friction, a heavy resistance.  i am in Gokarna. admist deities of great divine. pujas and worship, expression outwards,redirection inwards. yet..i feel so small.  i wish to be elsewhere. i don’t know where.  the friction grows. like the clicking of blackbird’s talons on glassmy mind is spinning faster than the beating of festival drums.“what do... Continue Reading →

Hampi pt 1: Savasana (Into the Bardo)

xlvi i’m astate of greyscale. i feel stripped. is this freedom or aloneness? i exitthe train.unlikeany reality i’ve experienced before.  arrivedin darki watchthe blackbird flickering his wings, “aajao”. (come) he flutters into the sky like a whim- perching on a rooftop ledge, he calls me.  i climb repaired stairsi seethe guru, standing, presence like a lion. fierce.  the sunrising,sunlight... Continue Reading →

Vancouver Departures pt 1 (Into the Bardo)

“what is it like to die?”  i asked. so small. so timid. my words, unveiling fate. aware of what’s to come, i cannot backtrack. thirty two hours from now.. departure. time is not linear, and in this moment, i need it to freeze. he is this embodiment. he is this person. with him, i feel bonded.like family, from another time.  i am... Continue Reading →

Cancer Moon (Prelude to India)

i am pulled.to where, i dont know. but i go, into the cold, into the night, alone.  i am miles from home reached first by car, but now i am on foot. it is winter in Alberta prairies. the white snow is muted grey, with outline of trees against black skies. i am not properly dressed, i feel burning in my finger... Continue Reading →

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