Departures

Oh time is beating faster and faster, 
I dig my heels into the earth to try to get it to stop. 
But I can’t. 

Nor can I dissolve all the gripping, clinging, attachments. 
I feel the anxiety ripping through my physical body and mind body, 
A war in my internal structures: 
“I can’t stay here.” 
           vs 
“I’m making a mistake leaving.”

I am frozen in dread
Of all that’s to come.

Amidst the internal chaos, 
The moon shines on, 
As she always does. 
Tonight she rests almost full, 
A Cancer moon, my moon.

She guides my focus,
To here and now, 
And whispers the truth I need to hear- 
“What will be will be. 
Regardless of if I get on a plane or not. 
There is a thread so fiercely strong, 
And it is weaving me where I need to be
And to who I need to meet
In (imperfect/ perfect) timing. 
There is no need to fear or regret, 
For as long as each decision is made with pure intentions and mindful awareness, There can be no missteps.”

I relax into her wisdom.

I trust it.

I scan my surroundings,
My senses heightened.
I keep listening for the wolves
But I think they are fast asleep.
Maybe they found their peace?
Maybe I should find mine too. 

It’s time.
I go. 

To the next chapter,
I go.